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Treat You Like My Own [CLICK HERE!!!]

July 30, 2007
music and lyrics by WILK
Adoption is the legal act of permanently placing a child with parents other than their birth parents. After the finalization of an adoption, there is no legal difference between biological and adopted children.
[but there are other differences……………………..]

The act of adopting, or state of being adopted; voluntary acceptance of a child of other parents to be the same as one's own child.
Admission to a more intimate relation; reception; as, the adoption of persons into hospitals or monasteries, or of one society into another.
The choosing and making that to be one's own which originally was not so; acceptance; as, the adoption of opinions.

I always felt a little “different”. Never really fit in, had that “black sheep” vibe going on my entire life. Was really the “lone wolf”. I was the guy sitting in the corner of the lunchroom in high school, always kinda hanging alone, didn’t go to parties, didn’t really go out. Luckily for me, I was a good athlete, and I was always part of a team. That was my “gang”. My “hang”. I often used to think, “what if I wasn’t good enough to be on these teams? Where would I go everyday? What would I do with myself?”
I was also very sensitive growing up, and I truly felt that my brother, sister and I were looked at as just a little different than the other kids in our extended “family”. Never really felt as if I had any real cousins, uncles, aunts, and as a result of those feelings, or “intuitions”, I really withdrew. Rather than force the issue, I just went with what I was feeling, and just got REALLY QUIET. Aloof, some would say. Filled that role of “marching to the beat of his own drummer”, or any of those clichés that you could come up with. I was more comfortable that way, but I have to admit, it was a bit lonely, as well. I think that anyone reading this, who knew me as a child would have to say to themselves, “yup, he was always out on an island, pretty much by himself.” Years passed, and my “feelings” started to become more tangible. For example, once my parents had both passed away, my siblings and I were rarely invited to any “family” functions, and as a matter of fact, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard, “oh, you know, it was just a family thing”. Hmm, I felt kinda “duped”, because I thought we WERE family.
“There’s just something about blood”. “Blood relative”. “You’re my blood”. I have no idea what that is about, but I know it’s a club that I can never be in. I guess I’ve always rejected that as something that I narrowly escaped. I DID search for my biological mother for a short time, but there was always this feeling in the back of my head, “what if she’s an asshole? What if she’s racist? What if I simply don’t like her?” Not knowing her, I finally decided, was the easy way for me to keep my identity as my own. It’s very complex, because I have to admit, I’ve been “searching” for something to be attached to, my entire life, no doubt, but I also feel this incredible sense of who I am, and my relationship with my parents and siblings has always felt free of “blood”, meaning that we are attached more by CHOICE. My parents “chose” all of us, and we made it work, everyday, just like everyone else.
In many ways, being adopted is like being black or Jewish, or gay. I happen to have been adopted AND I’m Jewish, so it’s even more complex. There is always this underlying sense that you’re not completely part of the “club”, at least in this country. How many times have you heard something like this……….“this BLACK guy helped me change my tire today, he was SO nice!” As if that is some kind of shock. Have you ever heard someone say, “this redheaded guy helped me today…..he was SO Nice!”? I kinda doubt it. How come nobody is ever surprised when a white person is nice? What’s up with that? See what I’m saying? I once had a very close friend who, when he found out that I was Jewish, said to me, “you’re Jewish?” like he was just shocked. Then he said, “Oh, that’s right, you were adopted.” Hmm…… I guess he was relieved. Kinda makes you think. Here’s a good one. Someone described another friend’s family to me like this…..“they have 1 adopted child, and one of their own”. Not 2 children……… 1 adopted and 1 of their own. Hmmm. Little subtleties that we hear everyday, that just perpetuate this separation that we seem to feel more comfortable with. There are so many people pumping their bodies with hormones, fertility drugs, just to get pregnant, and yet there are all of these children in this country, and all over the world, with no home, ready to be adopted. What’s up with that? Anyway, just some random thoughts of mine………………………. Someone’s gotta say it.
“You’re special in your own way,
you’re different than the others,
I swear on a stack of bibles that I love you.
You’re just like family
Closer than my cousins
Almost like my blood
This is what it is
I’m not sure who you are, I really don’t know where you came from
I’ll Treat You Like My Own”
Treat You Like My Own
[music and lyrics by WILK]

Here’s my story

[verse 1]
Little baby born, cute little thing
Tiny little nose, little ears
Mother says he’s gotta make it on his own
She’s gotta let him go, oh no!
Put him in the system
He’s always gonna wonder if his mother ever missed him
We move ahead and hope that life is gonna bless the little boy
We hope so

Strange how he never really feels like he’s at home
He’s running like a lone wolf
Even though he’s only 5 years old
He read a little book, now he’s always gonna know
That he was chosen
And she reminds him, over and over

You really should know your father’s mother didn’t accept you
It’s different when 2 people have their own
Your special in your own way, you’re different than the others
I swear on a stack of bibles that I love you
[you’re] Just like family, closer than my cousins
Almost like my blood
This is what it is
I’m not sure who you are, I really don’t know where you came from
I’ll treat you like my own

[verse 2]
It was the end of the summer, just before we’d go to school
We loaded up in the car like one big happy family
And by the way, my parents chose a brother and sister for me
My mom had a brother who was married to the mother of my cousins who were just a little younger than me
A 4 hour drive, you get excited to see your people
“are we there yet?”, Pretty soon

And each year we’d arrive there was nobody home
Never felt to me like a great big deal
Just an empty house with the front door open
Spent the weekend, watched a lot of TV
And never one time did we sit down for a meal all together
The mother of my cousins who were just younger than me
Was stayin’ late at the library, not very nice, such a long drive
I can’t pretend ‘cause somebody won’t let me


Lately the only time I feel at home is when I’m sleeping
I get to see my mother and my father, but only in my dreams
I bet you I’m confusing you, who am I referring to
I guess I’m still that child of 5 on the inside, livin’ on the outside
Make no mistake about it, something you should know
and she said,
I repeat


© 2007 IamAPerson&SoRU Music [ASCAP]
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